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The aforementioned | Thereafter

So, having no functioning television, I let most televised phenomena pass me by and keep to my many other obsessions, which given they are not typically found on non-cable networks I really have no idea how I become entangled in the predictably vapid storylines. I just found out that Stargate Universe has been canceled at two seasons. I don’t know how I feel about that…admittedly the cracktastic storyline that ‘we believe the good aliens will save us’ kind of turned me off, but the series had potential. And I’m willing to wager that bitter fanatics of SG-1 and Atlantis certainly had no help in the matter. But perhaps, I’ll bitch about that at a later time. My prior tangent did have a point though.


I had heard the reviews and the gleeful (lame, I know) praise about the series but I remained unmoved. Even my SO who gets headaches when staring at his fancy flat panel and can only stand the umpteenth (my guestimate is 150-ish) replay of Are You Being Served? (Good series, really. But I’ve probably seen the entire series at least four times by now, in a noncontiguous order) recommended it to me with enthusiasm. I think I finally caved when in a flight of fancy I was watching 200 (the Stargate episode, the two is not a typo for three. And how does it happen that I can tie everything back to SG?) and recognized the ‘young Mitchell/O’Neill-Danning/other Deluise brother’ as Cory Monteith. From Glee.

Of course that would shove me to watch it. Also, I think it had to do with my dissatisfaction with the other series that I had been following: Bones (once again, I do not appreciate the Booth and Brennan canon being force fed to me—I like Hannah and I know they’re going to axe her character for the B & B Happily Ever After if they haven’t already); Psych (James Roday played the impish boy at heart perfectly; but he’s gotten older—it shows, and frankly, I’m disappointed that the writers haven’t emotionally evolved him especially with the whole Yin and Yang thing and without it I have no idea how they plan to maintain Shawn’s relationship to Jules, especially when it will consistently show her playing the mother to an errant child); Supernatural (Ah, Jensen is pretty. But Gamble’s reaching for storylines, I mean how the hell can you go from Lucifer to, if Wiki is correct, Eve and purport the first woman as evil; it’s bad enough the Bible was written my some pompous jackass pushing it as the word of God like some dealer pushing crack, but carrying on the Eve is evil thing…it just pisses me off. Admittedly, I have no idea if that’s the same Eve, but since they’ve killed off Lilith, one of the first ‘wives’ who did go darkside, well… Anyway, I intend to finish the season, I stopped before Sam evidently gets his soul mostly so I didn’t have to deal with the hiatus, but what I had seen had not given me a reason to tune back in.); oh, and there’s NCIS another favorite I’ve lost interest in. I think it’s because I actually watched the Los Angeles pilot and have seen enough of their episodes to figure out that they recycle main cast members at the rate that they hand out bit parts to former actors that had starring roles on other series.

Hm, I’ve nearly forgotten that I wanted to praise and rag on Glee this post. So. To my point. Instead of sleeping, I’ve started Farscape on my Netflix and maintenance led me to choose to catch up on any of the above series’ and I said ‘nay,’ so ‘yea’ to Glee!

Seriously, Jane Lynch’s Sue is the psychotic kind of crazy that is absolutely FUBAR and I love it. The first season was so incredibly camp it was hysterically funny and deliciously genuine. It was everything wrong about stereotypes to the tenth power but good in such a bad way. Then…then second season started. The writers or creators, the omniscient they, decided to tackle real life issues and the tone of Glee went towards the side of drama that wasn’t even a smooth transition; it was just there and slapping you in the face. Bullying is a real issue. I get that. I do. I do not approve. Admittedly, I’ve been bullied—usually by older boys in elementary school, but the paternal parental unit was Army and therefore taught me to take the shit thrown at me and to throw back rocks and if all else fails, aim below the belt. Which I did. Thank god for sociopathic male pride—spared me from suspension on more than one occasion.

Back to the bullying in general—I’ve seen and read all the heartbreaking accounts of bullied students and I’m glad that they addressed it, but the method was heavy-handed to say the least. They tied the bullying most closely to the character Kurt’s homosexuality. Which…okay, is an issue, but the focus is on the deplorable needling of one’s sexual orientation and they let the more generalized bullying slide for the comical ‘slushie facial.’ Perhaps I read too much into it or not enough or maybe I’m inordinately sheltered for someone that had the sun-stroked preacher on the commons with the offensive sign condemning everyone, single mothers and divorced women too of all things, to burn an eternity in hell point at them and yell ‘repent.’ For which telling said man that he should perhaps commit incestuous relations because the Bible implies it is not the best course of action because then you get drawn into a debate about the literal word of that book and academic interpretations and…whatever the hell kind of interpretation he claims his words to be; then one realizes that she is late and bids adieu in the form of ‘save me a seat in hell, padre.’ I’m obviously in need of a digression. So I digress.

Perhaps, I’m just too suburban or used to the metropolitan air of the city I inhabit, but being gay is not that much of an issue. No. That’s not it. I’m just too conservative; the issue I see is about finances and tax breaks. Because it isn’t ‘holy matrimony’ it is a joint income that pushes a pair into a new tax bracket and gives them a tax break. Heterosexuals have it and so should homosexuals because they pay taxes, too. Just saying. Oh, yes, I am conservative, but I’m not a WASP nor a Bible thumper or anything like that—but I’m not too fond of ‘peace-lovers’ that have the audacity to jeer at a disabled soldier who received the goddamned purple heart; the man saved lives, the peace-lovers .

Anyway, I like Kurt’s character, but his storyline totally took away the camp of the show. I believe also elevating Sue as principal was just a bad decision—but they did it to coincide with the serious tone of Kurt’s storyline, I’m pretty sure. But Sue could not fulfill her usual bitter and crazy self when she was in a position of authority and was confronted by her own behavior embodied by the more violent and brutal character of Karofsky; encouraging or ignoring it would have garnered Lynch’s character the kind of hatred that people did not love and doing something about it like a responsible adult would have gone against her impetuous and childish behavior. But they set that right and returned Sue as just a teacher.

Back to Kurt. I am both morbidly fascinated with the fact that Colfer (Kurt) sounds like a girl and in love with the way he sings, but I have to be in the mood for it. Otherwise he irritates me 95% of the time—so I was in turn both relieved that he left McKinley to go to Dalton (bullying due to gay issue and loathing of self—the bully being closeted, I saw that coming…luxury of the camp and stereotypes the show is playing to) and disappointed that he is relegated to back up vocals to Blaine’s character (he always has the solo, at least Lea’s character Rachel has to share the spotlight on occasion). I must admit that I was surprised that they brought Kurt back to McKinley, sort of. I kind of expected it since his range complemented the other singers, but I figured they would have done a better job than the weird-ass plotting and scheming they have going on.

Once again, my high school experience was pretty far from typical stereotypes. Students in accelerated classes kind of dominated the top ten percent of the graduating class—the program I was in required that we be active with the school and branch out, so the smart kids cliqued together, but were also cheerleaders, jocks, drama, and band. I was track and orchestra.

So, I have difficulty relating to Glee’s McKinley High and cannot appreciate the complexities of the hierarchy of high school. Bullying at my school were some Latina chicks literally pulling each other’s hair and slamming each other’s head into the lockers while the douche they were both sleeping with just watched on. Returning to the show…I’m especially bad with tangents today; perhaps, I should have slept after all.

Original Song was a bit of a letdown for me. Luckily, the preview for the League of Doom set me right; for some reason I thought Sue was coach of the glee club that issued the range rovers and the entire time I was wondering where was that metro sexual glee instructor and Charice? Both of which made their appearances in the Night of Neglect. Part of my disappointment with Glee is that they are cutting down the number of songs—sometimes they go way overboard, the Madonna episode comes to mind, but other times it’s like ‘what the hell?’ I think that was my main issue with the Kurt and bullying thing; they cut out the musical camp for the sake of drama.
The originals songs were also a disappointment to me. Lea Michele has impressive vocals and range and while her song “Get It Right” does have her exhibit some of that range, the overall song is monotonous in sound. And “Loser Like Me” just kind of ends—it feels too short to me and was unmemorable besides the catchy beat.

So the main reason I’m a glutton for the asinine drivel they pass off as entertainment is the relationships. I so called Schuester chasing after Emma Pilsbury, even after I swore that John Stamos was freaking awesome and was Pilsbury’s true love and I would quit the series if they actively shipped Will and Emma. And they did. But I’m still waiting around because I must know what goes on in the next episode. Kurt and Blaine are too cute and I know that the preview where Monteith’s character exhorts “How could Kurt do that to Blaine!” is out of context for the audience and the spies. It better be. I did not spend half the season with Kurt removed from the glee club and mooning over (finally) another gay boy to have him turn into the tramp that his father warned him not to become.

Back to Will—I liked Holly’s character, even despite the fact, that Paltrow’s sudden foray into music was to tie into some country movie she did and was some kind of promotion for it so that people would not write it off on the assumption that the actress had not musical talent. Funny thing that I’ve noticed, music artists that try acting that aren’t Will Smith tend to blow, while actors that try their hand at music aren’t incredibly bad. Just. Anyway, I think I may be a sadist because I think Will deserves his shrew of an ex-wife, Terry. I mean, he married her in the first place knowing all of her psychotic flaws. And I also don’t like Will. The Rocky Horror Glee Show had Will registering in my mind as a major creep by pimping his glee club to cater to his pursuit of Emma who was getting less crazy by dating John Stamos’ character.

By the by, why are so many of the female cast crazy? Terry, Sue, Rachel, Kurt even Tina with her emotional breakdowns during her solos. It’s a bit insulting, really. I mean I’m crazy and well-adjusted, but I know some guys that have several screws loose. Where are they in Glee?

I think another reason why I didn’t like the original songs in the same titled episode was because of Rachel’s desperate attempt to win back Finn. Even after he admits to kissing Quinn and feeling fireworks and not having a similar reaction to Rachel. Even her song, for all her lyrics, is just an attempt to trap Finn in a relationship with her. It unsettles me. What I found more disturbing is my SO explained to me that this is what girls in high school do. Having explained that my high school experience was atypical, you should understand my disbelief. And evidently also according to my SO, I too am atypical.

Rachel needs to let go. Besides I kind of like her with Puck. Though that leaves the Zisces character flying solo…I like her too. She’s pretty fearless and ‘I don’t give a damn.’

I liked Sam with Quinn—but then again, I just like the nerdiness that is Sam. He’s such a sweet geek and Quinn wrecked him. And Quinn chose Sam over Finn, eventually. So a ‘marriage’ of convenience between Quinn and Finn was spawned—and with Finn’s attention straying to Rachel every now and then…well, I’d put money on Rachel getting what she wants by the third season, again. Which would leave Quinn and Sam, even though Sam deserves someone that is not a tramp. Finn also deserves someone that won’t asphyxiate him with her sheer presence, but it’s a campy dramedy in a high school setting. It needs to be quirky.

Artie and Tina were cute. But I love Brittany—and she and Artie just work. Rumors that Santana will be getting a romantic interest calms my nerves about her ogling and scheming about stealing Brittany from Artie. Tina and Mike, I love. Together, they uphold Asian stereotypes! And Harry Shum Jr.? Hot Asian boy! Hee! His abs are fan-freaking-tastic. Coincidentally, they are the most solid couple in the series and it’s most likely that the writers will break them up just to prove to critics and fans how unpredictable they can be. I will not be pleased. At all. And I’m not certain why.

Now Mercedes. She alone has chemistry on screen, which is surprising considering the writers have no idea what to do with her character. One day she is a confident ‘diva’ that wants her tots and the next she’s a pushover to the bulldozer that is Rachel’s entitled ego, when in previous episodes she withstood, challenged, and pushed Rachel back. And I guess they forgot about that linebacker that Kurt had fixed her up with in earlier episodes, but whatev.

I think now, I just tune into Glee because it is such a train wreck. As I said, asinine drivel, shoddy plotlines, and more than an occasional sub-par performance of a song...